Over the holiday, I have been reviewing things that worked in the past to help me in any number of ways. This blog was one of the things that I think helped me. I have tried to stick with "it" for years. You know "it" means get skinny, get healthy, get in shape, keep the house clean, stay organized, etc. When I turned 40 in September I had a goal. I watched 40 come and go along with my goals. Then I begin to hurt. The pain was different from what I have felt before. The pain stayed with me all day. It hit me when I got up in the morning no matter if I had worked out the day before or not. It hit me after 8 hours or sleep or 4 hours. It hit me after standing all day or sitting all day. It hit me after walking, resting, treadmills, weights, naps, or life. It felt like the flu in my joints all the time. It was my hips and knees that felt the worst but some days it was my hands or my wrists, others it was my ankles or my shoulders. It was always my hips and my knees. Some days I felt swollen but didn't look swollen. Some days I felt stiff. Some days even the sheets or my clothes hurt me. I tried to eliminate foods. I tried to eliminate activities. I tried ice and I tried heat. I tried pain medicine. Finally I tried the doctor.

He asked me about my sleeping, well it's never been good. He asked me about my depression, well it's not under control. He asked me about my pain, and boy did I tell him. He ran tests and took 5 vials of blood. He told me to stop running and see if we could get my pain under control. I didn't want to tell him I had already tried that. He gave me some medicine to help me sleep. I have tried that medicine before and it does make me sleep, for days. He thinks getting my sleep under control will be the first step no matter what the test results tell us.

Then came the holidays so we wait for the test results. In the meantime, I decided to look back over the past years when I had success with "it". I also decided that I am going to hurt no matter what so I decided to run anyway. I know that no matter what, I need to be in shape to face the test results. The best shape I have been in included running and weight lifting.

I also know that in 21 days you can develop good habits so I am not looking any further than 21 days into my future. I am on day 2. I hurt and I am sore but I am proud. I am excited for the next 21 days. I am excited for 2014. I am excited to finish out the 40th year of my life. I will take on the test results and I will be healthy and fit when I do.

See you on the road!


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- Posted using BlogPress from my iPad

12 weeks to 40.  Yikes.  Working my plan and I will be where I want to be when 40 gets to me.  It is a tough plan but it is workable. 

Where did the time go?

Go Jill, go Jill! I made it to rest day of my 2nd week and so did my daughter. We have gotten all our workouts in and diet has been good for me. We are just trying to focus on healthy eating and exercise with her so it's been great. I wasn't sure how long she would last but today for her reward we are going to buy her some shoes. She has been running in her school shoes which were her basketball shoes(not high tops). They are probably okay but have already been washed several times and been around the playground a few hundred. Hopefully we can agree on the price and the color while still finding her a good running shoe.

I am getting myself a new pair of capri tights. My legs aren't what they used to be and I have enjoyed running in the pair of capri tights that I have. Seems to give me the coverage and the support I need right now. I would love a pair of the compression tights but can only imagine how that would be to get them on.

Today I am celebrating my long week at work and my exercise by relaxing on the porch with coffee in my favorite mug. There is a cool breeze and the temperature is perfect thanks for last night's storms. I started the sprinklers and pulled a few weeds. I have already made pancakes for the guys. Now I get a little me time on the porch before the demands of the day begin.

Except for the flu like feelings in my joints, I have really enjoyed the last few days of working out with my baby girl.




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My middle child will be a freshman this year so that means summer workouts for football. He has been kind enough this week to go extra early since we are short a driver due to my oldest being at camp. We live about 10 minutes away from the school in the country which makes it about 20 minutes of drive time. Yesterday's workout only lasted 20 minutes. I had gone out to the pasture to get my run in so I asked my husband to go pick him up when he finished. This worked out yesterday because my husband didn't have to go in to work until a little later. Last night due to a storm, my husband had to work most of the night so I knew I wouldn't be able to count on him for a ride for this morning.

I felt extra brave so I decided to park my car at the school and run in town, yes, where people could see me. I did an out and back run on a little town street. I had to jump to the side, otherwise known as a ditch to avoid some traffic. It was a little muddy due to the rain last night but not too bad. I was able to get almost back to the car when my son called for a ride. I had left the keys for him at the car so it worked out perfectly.

I am not sure I wil be brave enough to do that every day but I sure felt good about it today.

Rearranging my life, one child at a time. But he is worth it!

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This blog has a reoccurring theme but I can't apologize for that. It's where I am and it's what's happening to me. I am behind on fitness, health, and weight loss. I am stressed beyond belief. We are struggling as a family but we are still together and working. Lots of things have happened this year that have added to my stress but I know we are all going through something.

I am working on my life. I am working on my stress. I am working towards my goals. I know the path. I know what works. I know how to get there. Stick with me and you will see me make it.

Long slow running results in long slow running, right? Right. I am trying to add a little speed work to my plan. Wow, this morning it really kicked my tail. I don't know what it was but the combination of the heaters, the speed, and my fear may have contributed. I felt like I was back in high school being tortured by Coach Albertson. I LOVED IT. I moved from activity to activity knowing I was on the verge of losing my cookies, literally. It's been a long time since I have run 200 meter repeats, maybe since my freshman year of high school. I am already feeling it in my legs.

Now for those of you that may pay attention to the times of my posting. Yes, I am working out at strange hours. I am reading some information about insomnia and different ways you can utilize the time you would normally spend laying in bed tossing and turning. I will keep you updated on my progress. Supposedly it will make the actual time you spend in bed asleep a better quality of sleep. I am going to try to stick with the plan 3 weeks and see how it goes.

Have a great day. See you out there.


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The mountains are calling my name.  Everywhere I look I see pictures of runners in snow, runners on trails, runners in the mountains.  My instagram is full of beautiful running pictures.  My own scenery is dull, brown, and flat.  I need some mountains.  I need some green.  I need something beautiful in nature to see.  But I also need somewhere safe to be alone.  I need to be outside.  I love having my treadmill but I was looking around the garage/gym this morning and it was dull, flat, and boring.  My quest this week will be to find a safe alternative and incorporate a little more outdoors into my workout. 

Yesterday the kids were talking about how you could see through some peoples fences while others were solid.  It reminded me of my morning runs from years back.  I explained to the kids that the group had run enough mornings that we could almost tell our pace and time left by the sounds, sights, and smells of the morning.  If a certain man had already picked up his newspaper, we needed to pick up the pace.  If we were ahead of the trash trucks, we were clipping along.  We knew about people and they didn't even know we were paying attention to them.  We could smell coffee and laundry.  We could smell the doughnuts.  As creepy as it sounds, we could even see one man wake up, stretch, and then get out of bed.  If we passed by his house and the covers were already thrown back and the man gone from his room, we were really late.  I always thought we should have stopped to tell him he should change his curtains or his lamp.  Some mornings were lucky enough to come across another runner and her dog.  The runner had night blindness but still loved to run 5 or more miles everyday.  We would call out to her when we would see her so she would know it was us.  Her dog had always seen us long before we had seen them.  It was another wonderful sight on those rare days. 

I am alone now in my running.  I like the solitude but I would love to be able to say to someone, "Did you see that?"  I hope my friends are still on the road.  I will be back on the road soon.  Something is calling to me and it is telling me to step off the treadmill and look around.

The month is going great so far. I have been getting my workout in early. My meals are good and my stomach is cooperating. I haven't had an attack in quite some time. I tried a food that's supposed to be a trigger for my self diagnosed disease. Brussels sprouts, who would have thought? So far so good. The only symptom of any kind that I might have had was just a shaky feeling about 2 hours after lunch. I don't think it was related to my stomach. It felt more like low blood sugar. I ate my afternoon snack a little early to see if it helped. The feelings went away after about 30 minutes. Not sure what it was. Maybe I didn't have enough protein yesterday. Who knows?

But other than that I have been feeling pretty good. My arms are sore from lifting weights. My legs are not being pushed as hard with the weights because I am also running. My knees are feeling good. My lungs are coming along. I love it. It makes me feel so good to accomplish my workouts in the mornings. I feel ready to attack the day.

Update on the 21 day no complaint challenge. I was doing good. Had several days under my belt but I had to move my bracelet yesterday because I was dealing with my son's college classes again. I felt like I was in Kindergarten and having to move my color down. So 21 days started over again yesterday. All I can say is that one complaint in the last 3 days is a huge accomplishment for me. It's not 21 days but it's huge.

Meetings all day today and tomorrow so let's hope the bracelet stays put.




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I am sure you all know about the research that says it takes 21 days of repetition to make something a habit. I would like to read about how to continue habits. When I am in this exercise/healthy/me, me, me mode I love the way I feel. So what if I couldn't sleep last night? When the alarm went off at 4:45, I got up. So what if I am so sore I feel like I have the flu? I did a lower body workout anyway. So what if the windchill is 22 degrees? Put on gloves, ear warmer, and go outside anyway. So what if no one else in the house wants to get out of bed? Take care of yourself anyway. But I know somewhere along the way this will all change and I will run out of steam. I won't have the motivation or desire to continue. If I did, I wouldn't be starting over again. I wouldn't be 23 pounds from my lowest. But I am and I am doing something about it.

I was challenged yesterday to a 21 day no complaint challenge. I made it through the day and lost it in the evening. I have this strange photographic memory about my stuff. I can picture where I put things and know they should be there the next time I need them. I think that's why yesterday morning upset me so much. My IPOD wasn't in it's drawer. The remote to the dvd wasn't on top of the tv, etc... So anyway, see why I needed to be challenged. I was looking through the junk drawer and surprisingly, I have an inventory in my head. I was looking for a brand new phone case I had bought. That's when I lost it and complained that I wished no one would mess with my stuff. So petty. In the challenge a complaint doesn't count against you if you can offer a solution to the problem. What I should have said was, "I wish I had put my phone case in a different place if I was worried that it might be moved," or something to that effect. Part of the challenge is to wear a bracelet on your wrist and if you complain, you move the bracelet to the other wrist as a reminder to start the 21 days over. I did great the rest of the evening and through the night. But I lost it again this morning. My DH and I have a constant battle over the alarm. He sets it knowing he isn't going to hear it or get up. I hear it, get angry that he set it again, and usually say something like, "Are you kidding me? You can't hear that!" And it's never a pleasant song or a sound. It's usually something like a freight train blaring beside his head. So I moved the bracelet. We have talked about this a lot. He says that I should say, "Good morning sweetheart, your alarm is going off." I say, "Don't set your alarm ever!" Almost 18 years of this. Definitely a habit I will have to change or I will be starting over with my 21 days every morning. 21 day no complaint experiment




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This morning's workout could have been a flop. My workout partner wouldn't get up. It was cold. My DVD cable was missing. My DVD remote was no where to be found. My IPOD???? But I also had to get a run in and thankfully I have a nice treadmill. So after giving up on Insanity for the morning I decided to hop on the treadmill. I changed shoes and socks and headed to the garage. It's about as cold in there as it is outside but there is no wind and it isn't dark so it's perfect.

I didn't have any music this morning because my kids have been messing with my stuff over Christmas break! I decided to see what I had left on my phone. Due to some crazy rules at Verizon, we lost our unlimited data when we had one of the boys phones shut off. Our parenting choice of grounding our child from his phone has been very costly. But I digress. Due to this unfortunate punishment from Verizon, I can no longer enjoy Pandora without using up all my data. So my music for my run was very interesting. I had a few ringtones, a little spanish lesson, a children's mix of multiplication and spelling words, some Kleinwood songs, and a sock hop album. I really need to get some touchscreen gloves because it was easier to listen to whatever songs came on than to take my cotton gloves off to change it. See, all signs pointing to a flop.

But I didn't let it get to me. I just sang along, worked on my spanish and my multiplication, practiced spelling my colors, and be bopped a louied(sp?). I got my HIIT workout in. I got two miles done on my treadmill. Wasn't ideal but I did it. And now I can sit and enjoy my coffee feeling good about what I did for myself this morning.







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2013 is a big year for me. I turn 40 this year. I know it's just a number and I usually don't worry too much about my age but it's out there. 9 months from now I will be 40. I have some plans for this year. I don't think they are resolutions. Nope, they are plans. I want to accomplish a few things this year. I am keeping most of them to myself. I will let you in on them as the year progresses. Of course the plans include some fitness goals, some health goals, some financial goals, and some personal goals. I will need you all as usual. I can't do it on my own.

However, I did come to the conclusion today that nobody really cares. No one cares if I get up at 4:00 a.m. to work out. No one cares if I don't. No one cares if I eat oatmeal for breakfast or eggs or nightshades. No one cares if I have cake for breakfast. No one cares if my pants are getting tighter. No one notices if they are falling off. No one cares if I am Paleo or BFLing or Cracking the Fat Loss or eating hog wild! Sure, people are supportive or not. People comment or don't. But in the end, I have to care. I have to be the one to get up in the morning and get my workout in. I have to be the one to make my lunches and ensure that they are healthy. I have to watch what I eat. I have to care. I have to make myself important. I have to have some faith in myself. No one cares that I will be 40 this year. But I do and I want to be a healthy 40 year old with at least 40 more years ahead of me. So I care.


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